I Dream of You

Heart pain. Exhausted. Tired. I dream of you last night. It was a beautiful dream. Remember my last post I told I was drunk and I message you. I dream that you actually replied through MSN. But sadly you turned down my request. My request was would you give me 5 mins of your time today to let me say a proper goodbye to you.

I was just hoping to be given a change, just ONE chance to hug and say goodbye to you. In the dream, we were still chatting, and suddenly you ask me this question : Would you like to go to Batu Caves ? and you continue by saying this rainy weather its very nice to see the rainbow together from there. I was shocked as I can be. I answered you straight away without second thoughts YES. After that, I was jolted from my sleep & from the dream. I cried non stop. I tried to sleep back to get back into the dreams. But I cant. I just cant. I tried so hard.

Its just A DREAM. And here I am back to reality you're gone. I only have myself.

When I first step into this relationship, I told myself you're going to be different from others. You're going to treat me well. If things is not happening, you will work it out somehow. This is how much I trust you. Maybe sometimes the way I acted towards you show likewise. Maybe I'm not good at expressing myself. Nobody knows. How much you meant to me. Before, now & future. No one would ever understand. 101 friends & family told me to forget about you. If I would to explain they wont understand. Even up to now, I still believe that you're a different person from the others that I have known. If you could remember, last time every time I would wonder and I can't believe that you're actually my boyfriend. To me, you're special.

Now that you're not longer mine to embrace and open for others. Please do let me know if you ever meet someone much better than me. I would give you my blessings. I believe that love is all about sacrificing & hoping that the other party is happy. As long as you're happy everything about me doesn't matter. I'm just a lonely puppy. You deserve someone much better than me.

For you, I will treasure all those past memories.

P/S : I'm sorry that I love you....